


Ladytron

by dreamiflame



Category: Velvet Goldmine
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Implied Slash, Infidelity, Not Beta Read, Not Canon Compliant, Sex Drugs and Rock and Roll, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-09-05
Updated: 2002-09-05
Packaged: 2018-07-13 20:55:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7136723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamiflame/pseuds/dreamiflame
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mandy and Curt falling in love with each other and apart at the same time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ladytron

**Author's Note:**

> A friend wanted to write something together, and I think wrote a few lines, then said she couldn't do anymore, so I finished it alone. Opheliarose offered encouragement and some light betaing, and I am grateful for that.

Mandy wasn't sure when it had happened, but she opened her eyes one day and met Curt's gaze across the room and felt a shiver run through her. Somehow, she'd fallen in love. With her husband's lover. She wished there were some kind of sign, some way of knowing she wasn't the only one who felt something.

"Mandy?" Mandy blinked and shook her head at the sound of her name. Curt was looking at her, an eyebrow raised.

"I'm sorry, what?" she asked, ignoring the slight smirk on Brian's face.

Curt studied her in concern, then grinned. "Too much to drink last night? Or something else bothering you?"

She shook her head and smiled, hoping the expression looked natural. "Nothing like that, darling. Just a thought that wouldn't let me go." She turned to Brian and kissed him lightly, then looked back at Curt. "What about you?"

He gazed past her to Brian and smirked. "Not too much to drink, no. But I didn't sleep much." Curt leaned forward, Brian meeting him halfway, and Mandy watched them kiss with a feeling of envy. She knew how Brian's lips felt, how he tasted, but now she burned to know what kissing Curt was like. They broke apart finally and Mandy dropped her eyes, suddenly finding her plate fascinating.

**

Mandy shivered in the cool night air and listened to the sounds of the party within. For once, she'd come out here, away from the press of people. Her head was spinning and she wished desperately for some quiet. She was in love. With Curt.

This was not a good thing.

**

Curt was smoking outside in the predawn light, and Mandy stopped, surprised, then approached him. She was glad he was there, as she'd run out of cigarettes the night before. Curt held an almost-full pack of fags in one hand, and offered them to her as she drew near. She took one of the slender sticks out and he set the rest down on the railing and pulled out his lighter.

He crushed out the last of his in one hand, as she put the cigarette in her mouth, then Curt leaned closer, his hand cupped around the flame. A thin curl of smoke rose between their faces, and Curt flicked the lighter shut, plucking the fag from her lips. She watched, breathless, as he took a drag, his blue-green eyes so near to her own, and felt a pang when he turned his head to blow the smoke away from her. He handed the cig back and their fingers brushed, and Mandy froze for an instant, then lifted the cigarette in a shaky hand to her mouth.

Curt reached forward and swept a bit of her hair away from her face, then cupped her cheek and brushed his lips across her forehead. "You've got pretty eyes, Mandy. But they're too sad." He moved back and Mandy stared up at him, the fag forgotten in her mouth. "You shouldn't let him hurt you so much. You deserve better than that. And I'm sorry that I've hurt you too."

There was a noise, and they both looked up to see Brian, standing in the French doors that led to his room. Mandy thought suddenly how it must look, her holding onto a cigarette she was forgetting to smoke, and Curt cupping her face and speaking to her in soft words. The look on Brian's face was anger and confusion and hurt, and Mandy shivered as he glared at her. Curt's attention came back on her as she shook, and he hugged her tightly before going back inside. Brian didn't move to let him by, so Curt slipped past him, their shoulders banging together, and Mandy sucked in a lungful of smoke and let it out, turning away from her angry husband to watch the sun rise. It was only after she'd finished her fag that she noticed Curt had forgotten his cigarettes on the low wall.

**

"You shouldn't take everything he says so seriously," Brian groused, lounging on her bed and watching as she brushed her hair. "It's not like he means it."

Mandy focused on ignoring Brian's words. He was naked on the coverlet, and he reflected in the mirror before her. He was still so beautiful, her husband, but she wasn't in love with him anymore. They weren't partners now, they were rivals.

"He doesn't like girls," Brian went on, and Mandy's hand tightened around her brush before she could help it. Brian was goading her, trying to make her react. She was through reacting.

Abruptly, Brian rose and stalked over to her, wrenching the brush out of her hand and spinning her to face him. "Are you listening to me?"

"If he doesn't like girls, why are you so jealous, darling?" For a moment, she thought he was going to hit her, but in the end all he did was kiss her roughly, angrily, and drag her off to bed. The sex was fantastic, if a bit violent, and Mandy watched him afterwards. He didn't look angry when he slept, and she slid out of bed and into a robe. Picking up Curt's cigarettes and her lighter, she moved outside, onto the walkway.

Curt was there, shivering in a tee-shirt, and she offered the cigarettes back to him. He took the pack and lit up two, handing one to her. They smoked together in silence, and she listened to the night noises, feeling strangely peaceful.

He crushed out his fag, staring up at the stars, and Mandy studied his profile. She took a final drag off her cig and turned to go back inside, only to be stopped by Curt's hand on her arm. "I meant it," he said, and drew her close, kissed her softly, then released her, and walked away. "Keep the cigs," he said over his shoulder, and Mandy picked the pack back up and tucked it into her pocket before going back in to her room.

**

Mandy was passing by Brian's room when she heard singing. It was soft, and she had to strain to hear it, and she almost walked on again when she did. "Ladytron", the song Brian had sung to her when they were courting. But it wasn't Brian singing, and she stood there, listening intently, long enough for Curt to reach to the door and open it before Mandy realized he was coming.

Curt's voice faltered, and he looked faintly ashamed when he saw her standing there. "Sorry," he started, and Mandy reacted before she could think. She stepped close to Curt and wrapped both arms around his neck, kissing him deeply. He made a muffled sound, then his arms were tight around her and he was kissing back, almost desperately. For a long moment, Mandy let herself go, relaxing into the kiss, then she pulled back and looked into Curt's blue-green eyes.

He was breathing hard, just a bit, and Mandy felt a surge of pride. She could still taste him, and she wanted more, so she forced herself to move back, to turn away. "Don't be," she said over her shoulder, and continued walking down the hall, concentrating very hard on each step.

"I'll see you later, then?" Curt's voice almost made her turn around and go back to him, but Mandy resisted. How to answer, when she wasn't quite sure herself? She settled for nodding as she opened the door, and risked a quick look over her shoulder.

"Yes," she breathed, seeing now that he was leaning against the wall watching her. Curt looked delightfully mussed and sexy, and Mandy wanted very much to go to him now, but didn't dare. Brian was still here, still conscious, and Brian would not be happy at all. Mandy wondered briefly why she still cared what Brian would feel, when it was obvious he'd long ago stopped caring about what she felt. She licked her lips, watching Curt do the same, and resolutely walked through the door, closing it behind her. Jerry greeted her at once, and she moved over to him, hoping that it wasn't obvious how weak her knees still were from Curt's kiss.

**

Three AM, and Mandy sighed as she looked at the clock. She wasn't tired, she was out of cigarettes, again, and she didn't really want to go find a drink. What she wanted, oddly enough, was hot chocolate, but she knew for a fact there wasn't any in the house, and the shops were all closed, so she wasn't getting any. She turned over again and punched her pillow, but found the gesture oddly unsatisfying. The house was quiet for once, everyone finally having fallen into their respective beds or drunken stupors or drugged hazes, but Mandy just wasn't in the mood for sleep.

Finally giving up on lying in bed fully awake, Mandy slid out from under her blankets and moved to the balcony doors. She opened them, hoping for a bit of fresh air, and got Curt instead, slipping in and shutting the door softly behind him. She gasped and Curt took advantage of that to kiss her deeply, his tongue sliding gently over hers as he pulled her close to him. His hair was wet, and cold, and he smelled clean, like soap and shampoo. Mandy tore her mouth away from his long enough to grab a shaky breath and shove his shirt over his head, and then they were together again. Somehow they made it from the door to the bed, and Mandy bit her lip to keep from crying out too loud as they made love.

Curt was much different than Brian, she discovered, more tender and patient, obviously concerned with her pleasure just as much as his. Mandy wrapped her arms and legs tight around him as she came, biting into his shoulder to keep from screaming aloud. Curt shuddered in her arms and kissed her fiercely as he fell over the edge, and Mandy wondered hazily why Brian ever let Curt out of the bedroom. He pulled her half atop him as they lay panting together afterwards, and Mandy wanted to say so many things to him, but didn't dare. Curt held her close and kissed her hair, singing "Ladytron" breathlessly, and Mandy laughed quietly and blinked back tears.

She was almost asleep when Curt moved and tilted her chin up to kiss her sweetly. "I have to go," he whispered, and Mandy nodded, her throat tight. He stood up and dressed quickly, bending to kiss her again before moving to the door.

"Curt," she said, remembering, and he turned slightly, looking at her quizzically in the dim light. "Do you think I could bum a cig?" He laughed and pulled out a half-full pack, tossing it to her.

"You only want me for my cigarettes," he teased, and Mandy smiled, and shook her head. Curt held up a hand, still grinning, but his eyes were serious. "I know that's not true, but for now, let's... let's not talk about it, ok?"

Mandy looked down and bit her lip, nodding, then looked up and forced a smile. "Will I-" she stopped, not wanting to push, and Curt moved back over to the bed and kissed her again.

"Count on it," he promised softly, then went to the door and left quietly, locking it behind him. Mandy watched the sun rise and tried not to think about what he must have done before he'd come to her, and whether or not Brian would be able to smell her on Curt. She fell asleep shortly after sunrise, and dreamt of things she didn't quite remember when she woke up. Her first thought was that it had all been a dream, then she saw the pack of cigarettes and knew it hadn't.

**

Brian was cranky today, fuming at everyone, and Mandy was being very careful not to look at Curt too long. After the third time Brian snapped at her for nothing, she gave up and stood, intending to go to her room. Brian caught her hand as she passed and pulled her down onto his lap. He dug his fingers into her hair and kissed her roughly, hard enough that Mandy could taste blood on her tongue. He pulled back finally and shoved her away violently, and Mandy braced herself for the fall she was sure she was going to have. Curt caught her, steadied her quickly then stepped back and went to Brian, sitting on the arm of his chair and leaning down to whisper in his ear. Mandy clutched her wrist and tongued the tear inside her lip where her teeth had cut into the flesh. Curt glanced up, then continued talking softly to Brian. Brian smirked and turned his head, looking in Curt's eyes for a long moment as he murmured something back. Tired of the dramatics, Mandy went again to leave, squaring her shoulders as she moved again by Brian's chair, her skin humming as she brushed Curt's arm. Brian's voice stopped her at the door. "I'll come to you tonight, Mandy," and he wasn't even looking at her, and one of the band members tittered.

For a moment, all Mandy could feel was hatred for each and every one of them, then she caught Curt's eyes on her. He shook his head, a tiny bit, and she blinked, then nodded. She didn't mind if Brian came to her tonight. It was about time anyways, and Mandy felt a pang that their relationship had cooled so much she was lucky if she saw her husband twice a month anymore. Curt looked confused, then smoothed his features and looked away, and her heart skipped a beat as she looked at him. "I'll be waiting," she replied, and left, shutting the door softly behind her.

**

When Curt stormed out of the house and walked away, he glanced at Mandy, briefly, then went on. Brian was screaming and she looked up at him and knew, finally knew, that if she wanted out she would have to do it. It wasn't easy, and she hated Brian even more for making it humiliating, as well. But she left, walked out, and checked into a hotel for the night.

Three AM again, and she missed Curt desperately, remembering the first night together. It was a surprise when the phone rang, jolting her out of her memories. No one knew where she was, she hadn't thought anyone would care, and Mandy stared at the phone for a long moment before picking it up. "Hello?"

She wasn't sure who she had been expecting, but it wasn't Curt. "Mandy." And the sound of her name on his tongue nearly made her drop the phone.

Mandy clutched the receiver hard enough to dig in, and swallowed twice before she could speak. "Curt." She rubbed her eyes and wondered when the air had gotten so thin that she couldn't get enough. The clock mocked her with its precise numbers and she turned off the light, not wanting to see it anymore. "How did you know?"

"Jerry called Jack. Said Shannon had called him or something. You know, the grapevine." His voice was husky and Mandy shivered, curling into her pillow. "He told us you'd left. I called around until I lucked out."

She had to laugh, and hated that it sounded bitter. "I knew registering under my real name was a mistake."

Curt chuckled, a low sound that shot right through her, and she missed him even more. "I never would have found you if you hadn't. Are you... are you all right?"

Tears choked her for a moment, and she concentrated on just breathing without breaking down. "I'm... I will be. And you, are you ok? And where are you? With Jack?"

He sighed, and Mandy could just picture him running his free hand through his hair. "Yeah, me too. I think. I'm in Berlin, with Jack, yeah. We're recording some stuff together." She marveled that she could hear his smile over the phone. "You'll like it."

"I'm sure I will. I've.. I've missed you." Mandy bit her lip. She hadn't meant to say that quite so bluntly.

"Me too. I've been keeping busy here, you know? And trying not to think about Brian. I mean... I'm hurt, right? And still I miss the fucker." Mandy nodded, even though she knew he couldn't see her. "But I miss you more."

"Yeah," she breathed, and felt her heart flip. "You sound tired, Curt. Are you sleeping enough?"

He laughed again, and Mandy had to smile. "No, but I'll live."

Mandy chuckled and put her hand to her forehead. "That's the hope, anyways. I don't know that I'll ever sleep again."

"No, you'll just smoke all the cigarettes you can find, get buzzed on German beer and wander the streets of Berlin all night until a cross-dressing original rocker stops his car beside you and asks if you'd like to work with him. Oh, wait, that was me." She laughed for real this time, and Curt joined her, and Mandy wanted to tug on his hair and kiss him. Her breath caught and she sighed, groping for her cigarettes in the dark. There was a crash as the clock hit the floor, and Curt was at once alert attentiveness. "Mandy?"

"Dammit." She flipped on the light and checked the clock, relieved to find it intact. Mandy put it back on the nightstand and lit up a cigarette, taking a drag before answering Curt. "It's ok. I knocked the clock off the table."

Curt was at once amused and not. "You worried me. How did you do that?"

She took another drag and blushed a bit, glad he couldn't see her. "I was trying to get a cigarette."

More laughter, and Mandy flipped the light off again and sank into the dual comforts of the bed and Curt's voice. "That's not surprising. So, tell me, Mandy dear, what are you going to do when you run out of cigarettes this time?"

Mandy giggled and set her cig on an ashtray. "Whine at you till you come bring me more."

"Yeah, right." She giggled more, and could hear his smile over the phone again. "I miss you. I have to go, sorry. Call me." He gave her his number and she turned the light back on and scrambled to find paper and pen. "Love you, hon." He hung up before she could respond and Mandy held the phone after that long enough for it to start beeping at her. Her hands shaking, she put it in the cradle and picked up her cigarette. 'Call me.' Oh, yes definitely.

There were four cigarettes in the ashtray before she realized it, and the clock read five AM. Check out time was eleven, and Mandy thought that maybe she could sleep now. She turned off the light one last time and curled onto her side, picturing blond hair and laughing blue-green eyes and drifted off, into dreams that were half memories.

**

The phone rang, and Mandy tripped over the bag of groceries going for it, landing hard on her hip. She cursed loudly, then picked up the phone. "What?"

"Nice to hear you too, darling." Curt's voice was full of laughter. "Something wrong?"

Mandy blushed and twisted the cord around her fingers, then shifted her weight and suppressed another curse when her hip twinged. "Sorry Curt, I fell, just before I got to the phone." She picked up the bag and set it on the counter, then went to the refrigerator for ice. "And now my hip hurts."

He sounded concerned, and Mandy smiled, putting the ice cubes into a towel. "How did you fall? Are you all right?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I tripped over my groceries." She put the ice pack against her leg, holding it firmly with one hand, then went over and pressed her leg and ice against the counter as she checked the groceries. "And I broke some of my eggs. Dammit."

"I didn't mean to make you rush for the phone. Just wanted to see if you were settling in all right. And if you wanted to come to a concert?"

She sighed and threw out the broken eggs, setting down the ice and concentrating on putting the rest of the food away. "It's alright, I suppose. It's quiet. My life hasn't been quiet in so long." Mandy wiped away a tear and took a deep breath. "A concert? One of yours?"

Curt exhaled slowly, and Mandy wondered if he was fighting tears, too. "Quiet, huh? Sounds nice." A moment passed, then he cleared his throat. "Yeah, a concert. I'll be in it, but it's not exactly mine. It's a farewell concert."

"Farewell?"

A sigh, and Mandy shut the refrigerator and put the ice back on her leg. "To glitter rock. We both know it's kind of..."

"Dying."

He chuckled bitterly; Mandy could almost see him nod. "Yeah. I'll be there, along with Jack. And a bunch of other people. Will you come?"

She closed her eyes and clenched her hand around the phone, trying to maintain control over her voice. "Will Brian be there?"

His breath gusted out of him and Mandy felt bad for asking. But she had to know. "I don't know. I don't think so." Curt's voice was low, almost too soft to hear. "I hope not."

"And you want me there?" Memories, always the memories, and Mandy wondered if they'd ever leave her alone. Curt, his eyes smouldering as he laughed and leaned down to trace his lips up her thigh. She shook her head, trying to focus on the present. The past was gone. She needed to let it go.

"Yeah." Curt sounded like he knew the type of thoughts she was having. Sometimes she felt so close to him, even though they were too far apart.

A concert. Well, why not? Curt wanted her there. And she didn't want to miss him anymore. "Yes. When is it?"

Curt let out a deep breath, and chuckled. "I'll send you the info with your ticket. What's your address?" Mandy told him, and she could hear the pen scratching as he took it down. She thought of his hands, and smiled.

"So, I'll see you then?" She asked, wondering if he would understand what she was really asking. Then Mandy wondered if she was really asking what she thought she was.

He laughed, and Mandy joined him. "That's the idea, yeah."

"OK," she replied, and clutched the phone. Her leg was still throbbing, and Mandy shifted her ice, trying to numb it. "Curt?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think about us at night?" Mandy bit her lip. She hadn't meant to ask that, but she wanted to know. It had been on her mind for a long time.

It sounded to Mandy as though Curt's breath had caught. She twisted the cord around her fingers and accidentally let go of her ice. It hit her foot, hard, and she winced, and bent to pick it back up. Her hand was shaking, and she pressed the ice against her leg harder, trying to focus on anything but the awful silence over the line.

"Yeah," he said finally, voice soft, and Mandy let up on the ice and tried not to cry. "All the time." Curt swallowed, and she bit her lips and willed the tears to go away. "I- I got to go, ok? I'll send you the stuff."

"Ok," Mandy whispered. A breath, then she said, "I love you," and hung up before he could answer. She pressed her hand to her mouth and shuddered, then wiped her eyes. Glancing around, she picked up a knife and started chopping things for dinner, her thoughts racing. Seeing Curt, and soon, and she'd told him. Dropping the knife, she buried her face in her hands and sighed. It would be ok. It had to be.

**

The concert had been bittersweet, and Mandy lay staring up at the ceiling. She'd only seen Curt for a moment, only gotten a brief hug and hurried words. Then he'd been off, slinking away before she was sure he was gone.

Brian had been there. Not long, and she didn't know if Curt had seen him, but she had. He'd watched Curt writhe and crawl and walked away. And that was really the most telling thing of all. It had been a last plea, a last song, and Brian had rejected it.

Mandy still tingled from Curt's hug. She wrapped her arms around herself and shivered, falling restlessly to sleep.

Knocking woke her up. She blinked, confused, and heard Curt, muffled, on the other side of the door. "Mandy? Mandy, open up." Mandy almost fell getting out of bed and stumbled over to the door, sliding back the lock.

Curt looked terrible, his eyes haunted. He crushed her into a hug and kicked the door shut, clinging to her as though afraid she would vanish. Mandy wrapped her arms around him and held tight, waiting in silence for an explanation.

"That kid," he murmured against her hair, and Mandy knew, suddenly, why he was here. She moved in his arms, needing air, and Curt released her, shoving his hands through his hair, then into the pockets of his jacket. "I'm sorry. I should go."

She rolled her eyes and dragged him towards the bed. "Don't be silly, Curt. Take off your boots." He obeyed and she shoved off his jacket, trying not to be distracted by all the bare skin of his chest. His hands fell to the laces of his pants and hesitated.

Shrugging, Mandy brushed his hands away and undid them herself. Slick skin against her fingers, and Curt blushed and lifted himself up to push them down. "I feel dirty... could we?" He gestured to the bathroom and Mandy nodded, shucking her clothes eagerly and leading the way.

Hot water and Curt's palms against her skin, but nothing happened, and Mandy told herself silently not to be too disappointed. Curt needed to talk, and had no one else. Wrapped in fluffy robes and towels, they returned to the bed, and Curt picked up Mandy's brush and absently started on his hair.

"I... he just..." Words were failing him, and Mandy touched his lips.

"He looked like Brian."

Curt nodded miserably and motioned with the hairbrush. Amused, Mandy presented him her back and felt his gentle strokes through her wet mane. Her scalp tingled, but Curt was still talking, so Mandy listened. "I, you know, gave off all the right signals, and he followed me up to the roof. He was high, sort of, and I fucked him. I don't even know his name and I fucked him because he happened to look like Brian." He hit a snarl and Mandy hissed. "Sorry." Patiently, he worked it out, and she thought wryly how some people would never believe the gentleness he was capable of.

"It happens, darling." She patted his leg and heard him shaking his head. Droplets flew all around the room and Curt brushed away the few that fell on her shoulders.

He dropped the brush onto the nightstand and drew her back against his chest, touching his mouth to her shoulder, and the vibrations tickled her skin and bounced off her ribs. "You didn't."

Mandy shivered and managed a small laugh. "Shows what you know."

Freezing against her back, Curt let his breath out slowly and squeezed her tight. "You did?"

Bitter laughter rang in her ears, and Mandy hoped that it didn't sound mocking to Curt. "It's hardly the type of thing one brings up in casual conversation. 'Hi Mandy, how's your week been?' 'Oh, not so bad, Curt. I found this guy at a bar who looked something like Brian so I got him drunk, took him home, and fucked him senseless.' I don't think that would have gone over well." She wiped her eyes, wondering if she could pretend the tears were from the shower they'd taken. "Besides, I wasn't proud of myself."

"No. Me neither." Curt was holding her more gently now, and she turned in his embrace, not caring that her towels rode up when she did. She had a question on her tongue, but he sealed his mouth over hers before she could ask it.

The terrycloth between them vanished, and Mandy grabbed tight to the headboard as Curt rocked into her, slow and steady and just exactly the way she had dreamed it for so long. Only it was better than her dreams, because he wasn't going to vanish into thin air when dawn came. And he didn't.

**

The reporter left, and Mandy turned her glass around and around in her hands. The cigarette smouldered untouched in the ashtray, and Mandy stared at the smoke, not seeing it. Brian. He'd wanted to know about Brian.

After all the years, Brian.

And he was here, too, in New York, though he wasn't calling himself Brian. Mandy wondered how long the reporter would be able to keep looking before they made him stop. She'd been visited by the lawyers earlier, though she was sure she'd been an afterthought.

Nobody remembered her, not anymore.

Curt had called her a couple of days ago. He was here, too. Wanted to get together before he left, but she hadn't had time yet. She lifted the glass and swallowed her drink, not tasting it, and went to find Curt's number.

"Curt?"

"Mandy? This is a bad time."

"Oh." She pressed her hand on the counter and blinked, the smoke bothering her. "Sorry."

Curt sighed. "It's not you. I'll call you later."

"Ok." She hung up the phone and rolled her neck, feeling the bones snap in it. Her muscles were tight, but she shrugged that off, and walked back to her table. Picked up the burning cigarette and took a drag, waiting. Killing time.

He didn't call back until later, but by that point she'd already told her manager she wouldn't perform tonight and gone home. The phone rang as she was drifting off. "Hello?"

"My turn for a bad time, huh?" Curt sounded rueful and scratchy. "I'm sorry. I'll call tomorrow."

Mandy shoved a hand through her hair and shook her head, even though he couldn't see her. "No, it's ok. Just... a bit tired." She yawned and Curt chuckled. "Ok, a lot tired."

Silence, then, "I could come over..." Curt sounded hesitant, unlike his normal tone. Mandy thought for a moment, then gave him her address and hung up.

She let him in before he knocked and he gathered her to him, holding her tight against his chest. Mandy breathed him in and heard him doing the same. She had to laugh. "We need to see each other more often."

"No joke," he murmured, his breath stirring the hair at her temple. "You see that kid?"

Mandy lay her head on his shoulder and nodded. "The reporter, right? Yeah, he came to see me."

"He wanted to know about Brian. Brian, for fuck's sake! How weird is that?"

She shrugged, letting Curt draw her towards the couch and tug her down with him. "It's been ten years. Sometimes people look more closely at things for anniversaries."

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her partly onto his lap. Mandy laced her fingers through his, and he squeezed their joined hands. "I ran into him, at a bar. After the show."

"Brian?" She hadn't known she could still be surprised today, but the thought of Brian in a bar, after all this time and all the secrecy seems absurd. Shannon would never allow it.

Curt chuckled, rubbing her back comfortingly. "No, the reporter. He called a couple minutes after you did, while the lawyers were sitting there." He shook his head. "I think I recognize him."

Mandy rested her head on Curt's chest. "Really? I like I may have, too. Can't think where."

He brushed one hand through her hair, petting her, and Mandy moved into the caress, sliding her hands beneath his shirt onto his warm back. "Member that concert?"

It was her turn to chuckle. "I remember the pants."

Laughter filled her small living room, and Curt lifted her chin and kissed her slowly. "Me too." Mandy shivered, and Curt smiled, pulling her closer. "You remember the kid?"

Comprehension. "Oh, him." Mandy lay quiet, listening to Curt's heart beat beneath her cheek. "He's changed."

His breath whooshed out of him in a strangled laugh. "We all have."

Mandy nodded, feeling Curt's muscles shift below her head. "So we have." It was quiet for a long moment, and Curt's hands found their way below the hem of her shirt. She shivered and pressed them tighter against her skin. "You're cold."

Curt made a sound that wasn't entirely a word. "I walked around for a while before I called. Didn't want to be drunk when I came here." He slid his hands out from under her shirt and stood. Mandy moved with him to avoid being dropped on the floor, and he held her for a long moment before drawing back. "Can I stay?"

"Like you really need to ask," Mandy said, trying for flippant and failing. Curt kissed her knuckles and let her lead him into the bedroom. His clothes came off as though magically stripped away, and her clothes followed quickly. Naked, Curt drew her to him, holding her tight.

"I know, but it's the polite thing to do, right?" He winked and Mandy swatted at him, not too concerned when her blow missed.

"Since when do you care about doing the polite thing?" Curt laughed, unapologetic, and tumbled them into her bed, catching his weight before he crushed her. Mandy wrapped her arms around him and held him close, and Curt sighed, returning her embrace. "God, I've missed you," he mumbled into her hair, and Mandy smiled, running her hands over his back.

They made love slowly, lingering over touches and kisses as though they would never get enough of each other. Mandy decided then that sleeping in Curt's arms was her absolute favorite past time. "We really have to see each other more," she murmured sleepily.

"Come with me," Curt offered, and Mandy felt sleep claiming her, turning over his words even as she fell into dreams. In the morning, Curt was still sleeping when she woke, and Mandy took the time to watch him and think it over.

Curt nuzzled her collarbone as he woke up, his stubble scratchy on her skin. "Morning." Mandy drew him up, kissing him fiercely, and he laughed. "You alright?"

"Did you mean it?"

Softly, "Yeah." Curt dropped his head onto her shoulder. "That's what you've been thinking? You woke me up with all the noise of wheels turning in your head."

Mandy swatted his arm. "You're awful."

"Yes." Curt grinned, unrepentant.

She bit her lip hard, and Curt pried her teeth apart with his tongue, gentle and forceful. Mandy felt a tear trickle from her eye, and reached up quickly to brush it away. "Yes," she said when they parted, and Curt's face broke into a huge grin.

"I'm glad," he said simply, and drew her back down to the pillows. Mandy went willingly, still dazzled by his joy. It wasn't a storybook ending, or a happily ever after, but she had long ago given up on them. What Curt was offering was no more than she expected, and the quiet joy she felt at the very idea made her smile.

They would go on, as they always had, but this time, together.


End file.
